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IFS Therapy in Philadelphia & Online Across PA
One part of you wants to heal, but another part is stuck in survival-mode.
Maybe you know what you want your life to feel like, but getting there feels overwhelming and impossible. You keep hearing about "finding your true self" or "identifying your values," but those words never quite land. How can you find something you've never really seen clearly to begin with?
Perhaps you've spent most of your life twisting yourself into a pretzel to meet everyone else's needs. Saying yes when you wanted to say no. Staying in relationships that drained you. Working hard to be liked, no matter the cost. The idea of facing your past sounds good in theory, but deep down, you're afraid you'll fall apart.
What if the parts of you that feel broken are actually trying to protect you? IFS therapy helps you understand those inner patterns and begin to heal from the inside out.
what is internal family systems therapy?
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Internal Family Systems (IFS) recognizes that your mind contains multiple “parts’” that impact your daily life and well-being. Parts can show up as emotions, beliefs, memories, or even bodily sensations. At the center of your inner world is your core self, the calm part of you that serves as your wisdom.
Through experiential activities, we’ll get to know your parts, gain their trust, and begin healing the wounds they’ve been protecting.
If you’re into role-playing games, pretend your inner world is a D & D campaign, with your parts as the players and your core self as the Dungeon Master. If you work from home, imagine your inner world as a Zoom meeting where your parts are your coworkers and your core-self is the boss hosting the meeting.
Unlike traditional approaches that may pathologize or label your experiences, IFS therapy honors the wisdom behind even your most challenging behaviors. These reactions are likely in response to some type of trauma or painful event, and serve as a way to protect you from feeling pain.
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First Session
I’ll ask you to openly share about what’s on your mind and what feels important right now. This conversation sometimes focuses on what brought you to therapy in the first place. I’ll keep track of your parts and reflect back what I’m noticing when I hear you talk.
Ongoing Sessions
Together, we’ll choose a concern to focus on during the session. I’ll engage you to notice how you’re sensing that part or concern in or around your body. Some people notice body sensations during this phase while others experience a part as an image or a thought. As you begin to notice these sensations, we’ll explore how you’re feeling towards this part of yourself. The answer to this question says a lot about where we go next.
We’ll get to know the target part on a deeper level including when it first showed up and what role it has in your life. Some parts are like workaholics that are stuck in over-time because they need to feel a sense of control. Other parts act like first responders where they swoop in quickly to get rid of the bad feelings. These parts operate on an “act first, think later” mentality.
Sometimes when we’re getting to know a part, other parts might emerge. Our conversation may need to pivot to a new target part in order to address its concerns.
IFS Activities
Parts Mapping is an activity where we use drawing, objects, or other visual aids to map out your parts. Externalizing your parts can help both of us keep track of them week to week.
Incorporating art therapy can be helfpul for folks who struggle to notice body sensation as parts. If you’re feeling consumed by an emotoin or thought, I might ask you to draw the part or find an object that represents that part.
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IFS helps you develop compassion towards every part of you instead of judging yourself. IFS makes space for all of your conflicting parts and doesn’t try to force change. IFS helps you accept your emotions so they can feel more managable.
If you’re struggling with disordered eating, IFS can help you stop fighting your eating disorder and become more curious about why it’s there in the first place. When you stop fighting with yourself, your parts relax so you can get to the root of your struggles.
The Core Self: Your Inner Guide
At the heart of IFS is the idea that you have a Core Self—a calm, curious, and compassionate part of you that’s always there, even when life feels messy. In therapy, we’ll help you access that inner wisdom so you can feel more confident and live a life that you feels authentic to who you are.
Understanding Your Parts
Your internal family consists of three main types of parts:
Managers are proactive parts that aim to control aspects of your life and prevent emotional pain. They might manifest as perfectionism, people-pleasing and anxiety. Your inner critic is a manager part. Managers also show up in our external roles like our jobs, parenting, and school.
Firefighters are reactive parts that spring into action whenever pain from other parts (exiles) gets triggered or threatens to overwhelm. They show up in extreme roles like binge eating, restriction, substance use, or dissociation to numb emotional suffering.
Exiles are parts that hold painful emotions and memories from the past. This can be anything from traumatic experiences, loss, and rejection. Sometimes they are referred to as your inner child.
IFS Therapy for Eating Disorders
If you’re struggling with food, you might feel conficted about seeking help. Maybe your eating disorder has been a survival strategy, or you’re afraid you’ll gain weight if you recover. IFS makes room for all of you: the parts that want to count calories, the parts that want to enjoy food again, and the parts that are fearful of change.
Through IFS therapy, we explore:
How Manager parts might use restriction to control gender dysphoria
Ways Firefighter parts use bingeing to soothe rejection wounds
Beliefs Exiles hold about worthiness tied to body image
The intersection of queerness and relationships with food
Supporting Partners and Families Through Transition
I also use the IFS model to support individuals whose partners or family members are transitioning. Your internal system might contain parts with conflicting feelings – supporting your loved one while grieving expected futures, managing social concerns, or questioning your own identity.
For parents of trans teens, Internal Family Systems therapy helps navigate complex emotions as different parts of your internal family respond to your child's journey. We work with protective fears, celebratory parts, and those managing family relationships, helping you find balance between supporting your child and honoring your own process. Learn more about therapy for partners of transgender individuals.
holistic and somatic trauma therapy
Internal Family Systems Therapy for Trauma
If you’ve faced discrimination, rejection, or childhood emotional neglect, it makes sense that certain parts of you are still on guard. IFS takes a gentle approach to trauma that allows you and your parts to be in complete control of how far you want to go.
My approach to IFS is truly collaborative which means I won’t push you to explore memories before you’re ready, and unless you want to. IFS helps you unlock your own wisdom because the healing comes from within you. As an IFS therapist, I draw on curiosity, creativity, and compassion from my own Self to guide you along the way.
Integrating IFS with Other Approaches
While Internal Family Systems forms my therapeutic foundation, I integrate complementary modalities to meet your specific needs:
Art Therapy and IFS
As an art therapist, I combine creative expression with IFS techniques to help you connect to your inner world. Sometimes naming your parts can feel overwhelming, so it helps to draw and map your parts on paper. Art-making can help increase body awareness in a way that feels both gentle and powerful. Learn More About Art Therapy.
Psychodynamic and IFS Concepts
Psychodynamic therapy helps you understand the patterns in your relationships by bringing them into full awareness. The feelings you have in our therapy sessions become valueable information on what might need to change in your life. Learn More About Psychodynamic Therapy
What we’ll work on
IFS therapy can help you…
Process past experiences and memories without needing to share details or retell the story.
Learn compassion towards every part of you, even the parts that bring you shame and create challenges in your life.
Visualize your struggles through metaphor and imagery to understand them with more clarity.
Connect to your inner wisdom so you can find clarity and feel more confident in your choices.
Heal childhood wounds so you can be more present in your relationships, career and life.
Stay clear-headed during stressful situations, rather than overeacting or shutting down.
You don’t have to keep stretching yourself thin to feel loved
IFS helps you build confidence to show up in relationships as your full, authentic self.
Questions?
FAQs
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Internal Family Systems therapy is effective in addressing a variety of issues including trauma, eating disorders, gender and sexuality exploration, anxiety, and PTSD.
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There is no set timeline in IFS therapy, and it can often depend on your treatment goals. Some people attend therapy for a 3 months while others are in therapy for 6 months or longer.
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While both therapy approaches have similar names, they are very different in practice.
Family Therapy involves you and your family meeting with a therapist together. So there’s at least two people in session (including you) or more. Goals in therapy address the relationships and communication between family members.
Internal Family Systems therapy is a form of individual therapy between you and your therapist. The model views your mind as “parts” and aims to help you understand the parts in your inner world.
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In our sessions, I guide you to notice and connect with different parts of yourself in a gentle, curious way. You might notice a critical voice, a part that numbs out, or a part that feels young and scared. Rather than pushing these parts away, we get to know them and understand what they need. Over time, this process helps you feel more integrated, grounded, and at peace with yourself.
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IFS can be a powerful tool for eating disorder recovery because it helps you understand the parts of you that drive disordered eating behaviors. Rather than seeing these behaviors as the enemy, we explore what these parts are trying to protect you from. This compassionate approach often leads to deeper, more lasting healing than simply focusing on changing behaviors alone.
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IFS is more experiential and internal than traditional talk therapy or cognitive behavioral approaches. Instead of analyzing thoughts or challenging beliefs from the outside, IFS invites you to turn inward and connect directly with different parts of yourself. Many clients find this approach feels more embodied and leads to shifts that go beyond intellectual understanding.
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Yes. IFS is well suited for body image work because it helps you explore the parts of you that criticize your body, the parts that feel shame, and the parts that developed these beliefs in the first place. By approaching these parts with curiosity rather than judgment, you can begin to shift your relationship with your body from the inside out.
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Absolutely. I use IFS in a way that honors and affirms your identity. For queer and trans clients, IFS can be especially helpful for exploring internalized messages about gender, sexuality, and self worth. It creates space to heal from the impact of living in a world that has not always been affirming, while helping you reconnect with the core Self that exists beneath those wounds.
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This is a very common concern, and IFS is designed with this fear in mind. One of the core principles of IFS is that we never push you faster than your system is ready to go. We work at your pace, and I help you build a safe relationship with your protector parts before we approach anything painful. You are always in control of the process.
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Every person and every system is different, so there is no single timeline. Some clients notice shifts in how they relate to themselves within the first few sessions. Deeper healing often unfolds over months as we work with different parts and address underlying wounds. I tailor the pace to what feels right for you and check in regularly about how the work is landing.
Why Choose Me for Your IFS Therapist?
As a queer therapist trained in IFS, I show up as my full self. I maintain awareness of my own parts both in and outside of the therapy room, and do my best to connect to your parts from a place of self-energy.
As an art therapist with over 15 years in practice, I have:
Advanced training in eating disorders and gender-affirming care
Expertise navigating the intersection of identity and mental health
Art therapy certification for creative healing approaches
Experience supporting partners and families through transition
Deep commitment to LGBTQ+ community wellness
In Person Therapy in Philadelphia, PA
Deeply rooted in social justice and inclusivity, Ruberti Counseling Services offers a dedicated sanctuary for the LGBTQ+, transgender, and non-binary communities. The practice specializes in gender-affirming care, helping individuals navigate the complexities of identity, transition, and societal marginalization. By applying an anti-oppressive lens and cultural humility, Christine Ruberti-Bruning supports queer and gender-diverse clients in processing trauma and body image concerns, ensuring that every person feels safe, seen, and empowered to live authentically.